Fishing and Freedom

One of the Points that came up today was that i have connected fishing to freedom. This romantic idea of the fisher in the wilderness standing in a river or paddling in a boat on a lake with the sun setting in marvellous colours from transparent lavender over oranges and a shining dark read on the horizon - and some day flies dancing in the air, obviously. Obviously this is the brainwashed version. 

The connection/definition of fishing as freedom however is common. In my youth we/I would go poach fish either in small becks and rivers or in breeding ponds for trouts where it was relatively easy to get a fish on the hook but at the same time an immense risk to not get caught by the owner. One time the owner of such a pond nearly caught us and for I was in intense fear of that he will tell it my parents. However, the point of doing something forbidden, breaking the rules was where I would experience a sense of Freedom and when I look at it then it was the freedom of “doing what I want, against what my parents told me” – the freedom from the socially accepted rules and norms represented and incarnated as the family-construct … obviously I was not aware of such a motivation back then for me it was exciting/thrilling. In this also some pretty unnecessary abuse was accepted and allowed because we could not take the fish home with us to eat them and then simply let them leave to rot or whatever.

 At one Point my cousin and me where also around, while the family was gathering, to get one specific fish within a small pond in a small beck that we gave also a specific name but for some reason – it was in the heart of the town and lots of people where around- we could not get the fish so went to a nearby breeding-pond and in a few minutes had caught the first fish and after a while the second. The first we killed and put into a plastic-bag to hide it and so we did with the second, but then we got the fear of bringing the fish home. It was like we first thought we could take them with us or…no, actually we where not thinking that much beforehand…not considering the consequences of actually catching a fish …we just wanted to fucking catch a fish because we were bored and disappointed because we could not get the “black mol”-fish in the small beck. –That’s like fucked up, because I remember that we talked about that it is unfair and fucked, we where angry that we can not simply fish in public in the beck...which would represent the society/rules/system, and so we simply “broke” the rules- But what is more fucked up, and was a Mystery for me till now, is what we did with the two fishes that we caught in the breeding pond: We nailed them on a tree and smashed them with branches, while doing so I would experience a strange kind of disgust but as well excitement and power and hysteric laughter because in essence I knew that we are doing something very fucked up. Or I saw it as something very fucked up, because I see also that I said a few times that we should take them with us. So basically we exerted out our anger and frustration on the society and system out on the fish and most defiantly the anger/frustrations had also nothing to do with the society or system rules on this particular day but was an outflow of accumulated Shit over time and this opens up a new perspective for me in seeing me and how I have defined anger and its exertion as freedom.

Another example would be the family-father-man that goes to fish on the weekends or after work to relax and recreate with sitting on the water with a angel. This angler also searches “his freedom” in the nature for a few hours or a day and when I look at it’s the freedom from the same structures and constructs as the family-construct and the work. Or the picture I described in the beginning with the wilderness – and this and similar pictures and imaginations are impulsed and created by and through specific fishing-magazines or fishing-films etc. -  where often a part of this fishing/fishing-holidays is this freedom from civilisation fishing somewhere in virgin waters –lol- meaning in waters where no other fisher has held his angel in yet – lol – to enjoy the freedom to get away form the stressing wife and the kids and the work one does not like but must do to feed them. I mean the very need and desire to feel free or to recreate shows that a being feels enslaved and stressed – in fear for survival – in its day-to-day participation in this I find the point that our current accepted and allowed relationship-constructs and systems are directly responsible for “sport-fishing”. May it be like in this first two examples the family-construct and situation of the being where a polarity-point of apparent freedom trough “getting away from it for awhile” shall be achieved or the work and economic-system which I assume is the video from my last blog a good example.

When I look at the desire to catch a big shark, to fight and dominate such a big animal to win than I see the desire for power and control – man shall go and dominate to earth…good ol GOD and as we all know MONEY is GOD – They want to fuck and dominate nature, because in everyday-life they are getting fucked and dominated by the System … directly fucked by GOD. And than this/such beings believe and think that it is their Freedom to do so, or even better their free Choice – because they have the fucking money to force their will and ego onto nature and these animals. This is a big ego-boost as an experience of perceived power and control for the mind to fight such a big physical being like a shark and when the fish is caught of pride as well - this is the way the system rewards fucked up abuse. The System within as the ego and the system without as the money system as it needs beings in such positions to kept the abuse going. From this perspective the sport-fishing is a balancing-out point where the slaves can experience a sense Freedom that is experienced as free Choice  when it is either a escape from reality as relax/recreate or a active acting out of Ego.